*6'/2 


NJo.  63, 

TRUE    CONVERSION. 

A   DIALOGUE 

BETWEEN    HOPEFUL    AND   CHRISTIAN. 

FROM  EUNYAITS  PILGRIM'S  PROGRESS. 


£ CHRISTIAN.     How  came  you  to  think  at  first  of  doing 
^     what  you  do  n 

Hopeful.  5)o  you  mean,  how  I  came  ht  first  to  look 
after  the  good  of  my  soul  ? 

Cur.     Yes,  that  is  my  meaning. 

Hope.  I  continued  a  great  while  in  the  delight  of 
those  things  which  were  seen  and  sold  at  our  fair ;  things 
which  I  believe  no w  would  have,  had  I  continued  in  them 
still,  drowned  me  in  perdition  and  destruction. 

Chr.     What  things  Rxe  they  ? 

Hope.  All  the  treasures  and  riches  of  the  world. 
Also,  I  delighted  much  in  rioting,  revelling,  drinking, 
swearing,  lying,  uncleanness,  Sabbath  breaking,  and  what 
not,  that  tended  to  destroy  the  soul.  But  I  found,  at  last, 
by  hearing  and  considering  of  things  that  are  divine, 
which,  indeed,  I  heard  of  you,  as  also  of  beloved  Faith- 
ful that  was  put  to  death  for  his  faith  and  good  living  in 
Vanity  Fair,  that  the  end  of  these  things  is  death  i  and 
that  for  these  things'  sake  the  wrath  of  God  cometh  upon 
the  children  of  men  ? 

Chr.  And  did  you  presently  fall  under  the  power  of 
this  conviction  ? 


2  CTttTE   CONVERSION. 

Hope.  No,  I  was  not  willing  presently  to  know  the 
evirof  sin,  nor  the  damnation- that  follows  upon  the  com- 
mission of  it ;  but  endeavored  when  my  mind  at  first  be- 
gan to  be  shaken  with  the  Word,  to  shut  mine  eyes  against 
the  light  thereof. 

Chr,  But  what  was  the  cause  of  your  acting,  thus  un- 
der the  first  workings  of  God's  Blessed  Spirit  upon  you  % 

Hope.  The  causes  were  :  1.  I  was  ignorant  that  this 
was  the  work  of  God  upon  me.  I  never  thought  that  by 
awakenings  from  sin,  God  at  first  begins  the  conversion  of 
a  sinner.  2.  Sin  was  yet  very  sweet  to  my  flesh,  and  I 
•was  loth  to  leave  it.  3.- 1  could  not  tell  how  to  part  with 
my  old  companions,  their  presence  and  actions  were  so  de- 
sirable unto  me.  4.  The  hours  in  which  convictions  were 
yrpon  me,  were  such  troublesome  and  such  heart-affright- 
ing hours,  that  1  could  not  bear,  no,  not  so  much  as  the 
remembrance  of  them  upon  my  heart. 
•  -Chr.  Then,  as  it  seems,  sometimes  you*  got  rid  of 
your  trouble  % 

Hope.  Yes,  verily,  but  it  would  come  into  my  mind 
again ;  and  then  I  would  be  as  bad,  nay,  worse,  than  I 
was  before. 

Chr.  Why,  what  was  it  that  brought  your  si&s  to  mind 
again  ? 

Hope.  Many  things,  as:  1.  If  I  did  but  meet  a  good' 
man  in  the  streets;  or,  2.  If  I  heard  any  read  in  the  Bi- 
ble ;  or,  3.  If  my  head  did  begin  to  ache ;  or,  4.  If  I 
were  told  that  some  of  my  neighbors  were  sick  ;  or,  5.  If 
I  heard  the  bell  toll  for  some  that  were  dead  ;  or,  6.  If  I 
thought  of  dying  myself;  or,  7.  If  I  heard  that  sudden 
death  happened  to  others.  8.  But  especially  when  I 
thought  of  myself,  that  I  must  quickly  come  to  judgment. 

Chr.  And  could  you  at  any  time,  with  ease  get  off 
the  guilt  of  sin,  when  by  any  of  these  ways  it  came  upon 
you? 

Hope.  No,  not  I ;  for  then  they  got  faster  hold  of  my 
conscience :  and  then,  if  I  did  but  think  of  going  back  to 
sin— though  my  mind  was  turned  against  it — it  would  b«? 
double  torment  to  me. 

Chr.     And  how  did  you  do  then  ? 


•YRUE   CONVERSION  '3 

Hope.  I  thought  I  must  endeavor  to  mend  my  life ;  or 
else,  thought  I,  1  am  sure  to  be  damned. 

Chr      And  did  you  endeavor  to  mend? 

Hope.  Yes,  and  fled  from  not  only  my  sins,  but  sinful 
company  too,  and  betook  me  to  religious  duties;  as  pray- 
ing, reading,  weeping  for  sin,  speaking  truth  to  my  neigh- 
bors, etc.  *  These  things,  did  I,  with  many  others,  too 
much  here  to  relate. 

Chr.     And  did  you  think  yourself  well  then  ? 

Hope.  Yes,  for  awhile ;  but  at  the  -last  my  trouble 
came  tumbling  upon  me  again,  and  that  over  the  neck  of  all 
my  reformations.  • 

Chr.  How  came  that  about,  since  you  were  now  re- 
formed 1 

Hope.  There  were  several  things  brought  it  upon  me, 
especially  suck  sayings  as  these :  M  All  our  righteousnesses 
are  as  filthy  rags."  "  Bv  the  works  of  the  law  shall  all 
flesh  be  justified."  t(  When  ye  have  done  ail  these  things, 
say,  We  are  unprofitable  f*  with  many  more  suoh  like. 
From  whence  I  began  to  reason  with  myself  thus.:  If  all 
my  righteousnesses  are  as  filthy  rags,  if  by  deeds  of  the  t 
law  no  man  can  be  justified,  and  if,  when  we  have  done 
all,  we  are  yet  unprofitable,  then  is  it  but  a  folly  to  think 
of  heaven  by  the  law.  I  farth^  thought  thus :  If  a  man 
runs  a  hundred  pounds  into  the  shopkeeper's  debt,  and 
after  that  shall  .pay  for  all  that  he  shall  buy ;  yet  if  his  old 
debt  stand  still  in  the  book  uncrossed,  the  shopkeeper  may 
sue  him  for  it,  and  cast  hira  into  prison  till  he  shall  pay 
the  debt. 

Chr.     Well,  and  how  did  you  apply  this  to  yourself  ? 

Hope.  Why,  1  thought  thus  with  .myself:  I  have  by 
ay  sins  run  a  great  way  into  God's  book,  and  my  now  re- 
forming will  not  pay  off  that  score.  Therefore,  I  would 
think  still,  under  all  my  present  amendments,  but  h<?w* 
shall  1  be  freed  from  that  damnation  that  I  brought  myself 
in  danger  of  by  my  former  transgressions  ? 

Chr.  #  A  very  good  application;  but  pray  go  on. 
Hope.     Another  thing  that  hath  troubled  me  evej  since 
my  late  amendments  is,  that   if  I  look  narrowly  into  the 
best  of  what  I  do  now,  I  still  see  sin,*  new  sin?  mixing  it- 


4  TRUE   CONVERSION, 

self  with  the  best -of  that  I  do;,  so  that  now  I  am  forced  to 
conclude  that,  notwithstanding  my  former  fond  conceits  of 
myself  and  duties,  I  have  committed  sin  enough  in  one 
day  to  send  me  to  hell7  though  my  former  life  had  been 
faultless. 

Chr.     And  what  did  yon  cfo  then  ? 

Hope.     Do  !     I  could  not  tell  what  to  do,  until  I  broke 
my  mind  to  Faithful ;  for  he  and  I  were  well  acquainted.^ 
And  he  told  me,  that  unless  I  could  obtain,  the  righteous-" 
ness  of  a  Man  that  had  never   sinned,  neither  mine  own,. 
nor  all  the  righteousness  of  the  jg orld  could  save  me. 

Chr.     And  did  you  think  he  "spake  true  ? 

Hope.  Had  he  told  me  go  when  I  was  pleased  and  sat- 
isfied with  my  own  amendments,  I  had  called  him  fool  for 
hig_  pains  ;  but  now,  since  I  see  my  own  infirmity;  aiid  the 
sin  which  cleaves  to  my  bests  performance,  I  have  been 
forced  to  be  of  his  opinion. 

Chr.     But  did  you  think,,  when  at  first  he  suggested  it 
♦to. you,  that  there  was  such  a  man  to  be  found,  of  whom  it 
might  justly  be  said,  that  he  never  committed  sin  ? 
•  Hope.     I  must  confess  the  words  at  first  sounded  strange- 
ly ;  but  after  a  little  more  talk  and  company   with  him,  I 
had  full  conviction  about  it.  '  ' 

Chr.  And  did  you  ask  him  what  man  this  Was*,  and 
how  you  must  be  justified  by  him  ? 

Hope.  Yes ;  and  he  told  me  it  was  tile  Lord  Jesus, 
that  dwelleth  on  the  right  hand,  of  the  Most  High.  And 
thus,  said  he,  you  must  be  justified  by  him,  even  by  trust- 
ing to  what  he  hath  done  by  himself  in  the  days  of  his 
flesh,  and  suffered  when  he  did  hang- on  the  tree.  I  asked 
him  further,  how  that  man's  righteousness  could  be  of 
such  efficacy,  to  justify  another  before  God.  And  he  told 
me  he  was  "the  mighty  God,"  and  did  what  be  dr$,  and 
died  the  death  also,  no*  for  himself,  but  for  me ;  and  to 
whom  his  doings,  and  the  worthiness  of  them,  should  be 
imputed,  if  I  believed  on  him., 
-     Chr.     What  did  you  do  then  V 

Hop*.     I   made   my  objections   against  believing,  for  I 
thought  he  was  not  willing-  to  save  me , 
■   Chr.-  *   And  what  said  Faithful  to  you  then  ? 


true  CON ver:  D 

Hope.  He  bid  me  go  to  Him  and  bee.  Then  I  said  it 
resumption.  He  said,  No;  for  I  was  invited  to 
come.  Then  he  gave  me  a  book  of  Jesus'  inditing,  to  en- 
courage me  the  more  freely  to  come ;  and  he  said  concern- 
ing that  book,  that  every  jot  and  tittle  thereof  stood  firmer 
.than  heaven  and  earth.  Then  I  asked  him  what  I  must 
do  when  1  came  ;  and  he  told  me  I  must  entreat  upon  my 
knees,  with  all  my  heart  and  soul,  the  Father  to  reveal 
him  to  me.  Theu  I  asked  him  further,  how  I  must  make 
my  supplications  to  him  ;  and  he  said  :  Go,  and  thou  shalt 
find  him  upon  a  mercy-seat,  where  lie  sits  all  the  year  long- 
to  give  pardon  and  forgiveness  to  them  that  come.*  I  fold, 
him  that  I  knew  not  what  to  say  when  I  came;  and  he 
bade  me  say  to  this  effect :  God  be  merciful  to  me  a  sinner  v 
and  I  make  me  to  know  and  believe  in  Jesus  Christ ;  for  I 
see,  that  if  his  righteousness  had  not  been,  or  I  have  not. 
faith  in  righteousness,  I  am  utterly  cast  stway.  Lord,  I 
ueard  that  thou  art  a  merciful  God,  and  hast  ordain- 
ed that  thy  Son  Jesus  Christ  should  be  the  Saviour  of  the 
world;  and  moreover,  that  thou  art  willing  to  bestow  him 
upon  such  a  poor  sinner  as  I  am.  And  I  am  a  sinner,  in- 
deed. Lord,  take,  therefore,  this  opportunity,  and  mag- 
nify, thy  grace  in  the  ^salvation  of  my  soul,  through  thy 
Son  Jgsus  Christ.     Amen. 

Glib.     And  did  you  do  as  you  were  bid  1 

Hope.      Yes  ;  over,  and  over,  and  over. 
.    Che.     And  did  the  Father  reveal  the  Son  to  you? 

Hope.  Not  at  the  first,  nor  second,  nor  third  nor  fourth, 
nor  fifth,  no,  nor  the  sixth  time  neither. 

Chr.      What  did  you  do  then  ? 

Hope.     What?     Why,  1  could  not  tell  what  to  do. 

Chii      Had  you  not  thoughts  of  leaving  off  graying  ? 

Hope.     Yes;  and  a  hundred  times  twice  told. 

Che.      And  what  was  the  reason  you  did  not? 

Hope.  I  believed  that  it  wa.s  true  which  hath  been  told 
me,  to  wit:  that  without  the  righteousness  of  this  Christ, 
all  the  world  could  not  save  me  ;  and,  therefore,  thought 
I  with  myself,  if  I  leave  off,  I  die,  and  I  can  but  die  at  the 
throne  b#  grace.  And  withal,  this  came  into  my  mind  : 
"  If  it  tarry,  wait  for  it ;  because  it  will  surely  come,  and 


it  TRUfi   CONVERSION 

will  not  tarry."  So  I  continued  praying  until  the  Father 
showed  me  his  Son. 

Qg3K«*<  *'»"d  how  was  he  revealed  unto  you  ? 
'  Hope.  I  did  not  see  him  with  my  bodily  eyes,  but  with 
the  eyes  of  dan  understanding ;  and  thus  it  was :  One  day 
I  was  very  sad,  1  think  sadder  than  at  any  one  time  in  my 
life ;  and  thi»-  sadness  was  through  a  fresh  sight  of  the 
oreatness  'and  vileness  of  my  sins.  And  as  1  was  then 
looking  for  nothing  but  hell,  and  the  everlasting  damnation 
of  my  soul,  suddenly,  as  1  thought,  I  saw  the  Lord  Jesus 
looking  down  from  heaven  upon  me,  and  saying,  '  Be- 
lieve on  trie  Lord  Jesus  Christ,  and  thou  shalt  be  saved." 

But  I  replied,  Lord,  I  am  a  great,  a  very  great  sinner; 
and  he  answered,  (l  My  grace  is  sufficient  for  thee. "     Then 

I  said,  "But,  Lord,  what  is  believing?"  And  then  I  saw 
from  that  saying,  (t  He  that  cometh  to  me  shall  never 
tbirst,,,xthat  believing  and  coming  was  all  one;  and  that 
he  came,  that  is,  that  ran  out  in  his  heart  and  affections 
after  salvation  by  Christ/be,  indeed-,  believed  in  Christ. 
Then  the  wat?r  stood  in  mine  eyes,   and   I  asked  further, 

II  But,  Lord,  may  such  a  great  sinner  as  I  am  be  indeed 
accepted  of  thee,  and  be  saved  by  thee?"  And  I  heard 
him  say,  "And  him  that  cometh  tb  me  I  will  in  nowise 
cast  out."  Then  l'said,  But  how  Lord,  must  I  consider 
of  thee  in  my  coming  to  thee,  that  my  faith  may  be  placed 
aright  upon  thee?  Then  he  said,  "Christ  Jesus  came 
into  the  world  to  save  sinners."  He  is  the  end  of  the  law 
for  righteousness  to  every  one  that  believes.  He  died  for 
our  sins,  and  rose  again  fo*  our  justification.  He  ioyed 
us,  and  washed  us  froln  our  sins  in  his  own  blood.  He  is 
the  Mediator  between  God  and  us.  He  ever  liveth  to 
make  intercession  for  us.  From  all  which  \  gathered,  that 
1  must  look  for  righteousness  in  his  person,  and  for  satis- 
faction for  my  sins  by  his  blood  ;  that  what  he  did  in  obe- 
dience to  his  Father  s  law,  and  in  submitting  to  the  penal- 
ty thereof,  was  not  for  himself,  but  for  him  that  will  accept 
it  for  his  salvation,  and  be  thankful.  And  now  wa^my 
heart  full  of.  joy,  mine 'eyes  full  of  tears,  and  mine  affec- 
tions running  over  with  love  to  the  name,  people,  a<nd  wayg 
of  Jesus  Christ. 


TRUE    CONVERSION.  7 

Chr.  This  was  a  revelation  of  Christ  to  your  soul,  in- 
deed. But  tell  me  particularly,  what  effect  this  had  upon 
your  spirit. 

Hope.  It  made  me  see  that  all  the  world,  notwithstand- 
ing all  the  righteousness  thereof,  is  in  a  state  of  condem- 
nation. It  made  me  see  that  God  the  Father*,  iHo.ugh  he 
be  just,  can  justly  justify  the  coming  sinner.  It  made 
me>greatly  ashamed  of  the  vileness  of  my  former  life,  a*id 
confounded  me  with  the  sense  of  mine  own  ignorance ;  for 
there  never  came  a  thought  into  my  heart  '  °fore  now  that 
showed  me  so  the  beauty  of  Jesus  Christ.  It  2>ade  me  love 
a  holy  life,  and  long  to  do  something  for  the  honor  and  glofy 
of  the  name  of  the  Lord  Jesus.  Yea,  I  thought  that  had 
I  now  a  thousand  gallons  of  blood  in  my  body,  1  could 
spill  it  all  for  the  sake  of  the  Lord  Jesus. 


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